Disturb your Loved ones – Express it out!

Hello Readers!

Long time… I know… It has been really long I have blogged some sense too… Well, all these days I was held up with various things…  Right from my studies to work to personal life… It was all hectic 🙂 .  Now that I’ve found a lot of time to write, I wish to write something that I’ve learnt in the process of “living” all these years… “Survival” is totally different than “Living” and I understood the difference on the go of so many years… Let us see if most of us are “Surviving” or “Living” .

It all started with a text message, way back in 2008, ” You are a wonderful person and you do mean a lot to me Zubin, you have always been there for my help, how would I forget you after Intermediate?” which I typed in fluke to one of my class mates in the college and he still sticks to it and stands as a very good friend of mine. Initially, I thought he was trying to flirt with me whenever he ran for my help, even for the silliest of things, but then, recently, when he met me with his wife, he told her ” Farah! see, she is that friend who made me feel so good with her words…Had she not texted me that day telling that I am a wonderful person, I wouldn’t be who I am now… Her words meant a lot to me that day when I felt used up by my friends… She was the only one among all of them who spoke such soothing words to me… It did work well on me… I was so stupid that I went to an extent of ending my life for nothing… I felt that my survival meant nothing but then came her text, and today, I am a doctor-Saving many a lives!!”
I did not know that one message actually is saving many a lives today… It was totally un-intentional.. I thought Zubin got emotional coz we were all going to finish our intermediate education and were going to part our ways soon… I never knew that there was so much to it… I smiled and went back to a few more such instances where some people made my life worth “Living” .

One such instance is when I cleared my Accounts exam, in the final semester of my MBA… I had failed terribly for 5 times. This time- I passed!! I called up to my parents, sister and a few of my well wishers, to tell that I was now a Post Graduate. Their responses were all the usual wishes and “I am so happy for you” , “You did it-finally” kind of ones… I straightaway went to my Best Friend’s place to convey the good news… Though I had already conveyed the news to her over phone, when I went to her house, I saw the happiness and achievement in her eyes… She felt like she achieved something, that Pride filled happiness was so much visible on her face… She laughed her heart off and finally, she said “Hey, let me take a Selfie with you… You are an MBA now and it is no big joke… After your MBA, the first ever selfie you are taking is with me, remember that!”  That moment, I literally had tears in my eyes but I could not express myself… I felt that my hard-work was totally justified… My bestie did not tell any words… She very well expressed her happiness for me.. Infact, she was more proud of me than I being proud of myself for passing the exam… Though it was a simple gesture, it did mean a lot to me, it still does…

Similarly, many a instances have occurred in my life due to many people and to many people because of me, where both- the person/people and I have felt that “This life of mine is worth living” 

Most of the time, many of us don’t express it out to our loved ones.. Be it our parents, our siblings or our friends or colleagues… I know it is difficult to express out how we are grateful to someone, but at some point (the sooner you say, the better it is), express…  Every now and then, when you are speaking to someone or when you are with someone, speak about what good they did to you and how you are thankful for it…
It need not be a big speech… It can be a simple gesture like a smile or may be a nod.
May be you can tell how much your friend means to you, with a small gift, a small note on their birthday, or may be a greeting card  or a simple text message sometime, when they never expect it coming from you. 🙂
To your parents, gratitude would be a very small word, hence, the best gesture you can show is giving them your time… May be 30 min… We have a lot of time for social media and friends, but not to our parents/family. The best ever thing to express how much you love your family and how much you care for them is to give them some of your time everyday… I don’t see any harm in giving an hour’s time to my parents and sis, every evening after a hectic day at work.

I may not be qualified to speak on how to express love to your spouse or gf/bf… All I can say is, there is more to show your love to them rather than just telling “I Love You”-cinematically… I always laugh when some one says I Love You to their spouse or gf/bf… It is as stupid as that.. I don’t understand why should some one tell it always when they are actually together because love is the one that binds them. There are many more things to express love to your other half is what I feel… As I already mentioned that I am not qualified enough for this now, I will slowly but surely decipher better ways to express 😛

Remember one thing friends, most of us must have felt good and worthy of living our lives, when we are appreciated, when we feel loved by others and when someone praises us and our work… More than anything, we personally feel good when someone lends their ears to us, without judging us, even a bit, without offering any sort of solution but calmly assuring that they are with us, we literally feel on cloud9… So it is, with others… With smallest of gestures or may be smoothest of words, we could make some one else’s life worth living.. .May be a word or two, may be someone out there needs more than a pair of ears- a heart to understand, a heart to empathise, a shoulder to lean on, a calm yet strong assurance that they have someone by them… May be your simple smile can brighten someone’s day.. May be your simple text message with some soothing words can make a person change to a whole new person… You just don’t know…
Most of us think that the other person is busy in their life and it is not just right to disturb them with a phone call or a message… Trust me, this is just a myth!

  • If you feel you need some help, don’t ever hesitate to ask… Be it even at the mid of night, feel free to disturb them and ask for help – This way, they too will feel free to approach you when you are needed…
  • Tell the person how much their presence in your life has impacted you, make them feel good and worthy… They will do even more than before… Don’t mistake this for flattering.. Be honest and tell them the truth..
  • It is always better to express gratitude to the person immediately, it need not be a simple thanks… It can be a small gift, a note, a FB post, or a simple text message…
  • Build trust in people’s heart that you are always there for them, they will also do the same to you…
  • Call your friends once or twice a week and text them everyday. Appreciate them humorously or simply tag them on any random post on FB so that they comment on it and you can have a good chat with them and constantly be in touch with them.
  • Above everything, lend your time to people around you, give them wholehearted attention coz sometimes all that a person may need is a heart that silently listens and ensures them to stay strong and fight their odds…

Remember something Friends, all of us are Humans…at some point of life, we do crave for the need to be appreciated, loved and cheered… Just like how someone helps us feel good, it is also our duty to fulfil their needs as well… Remember that people keep coming and going in our life to teach us something, to make us feel worthy and worthless as well… We often sit and waste our time in judging and assuming things about others… Why not for once, we think only good and send good vibes to all those around us… It will surely reflect back to us some day… Let us not expect it, but there is nothing wrong in making someone “Live” rather than just “Survive” … All of us would be animals if we solely depend on water, food and air for our survival… We, as Humans need more – We need Emotional connection, may be that is why we have an extra sense and we are made special by God… We can talk… Lets make great use of these senses.

There is no harm in making the ones around you feel special by disturbing them with messages or calls or making your presence being felt by them at the right time 🙂

 

Cheers,
Meenakshi Iyer a.k.a Aarya

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